Monday, May 19, 2008


So my friend Jen has written and published (which is the greater feat by far) her first Young Adult novel called Shift. I have pre-ordered on amazon (follow the link and you can too!) and am waiting for the smiling box to appear in the mail any day. I can't wait to start reading it. Following the Shift's conception and fruition has been fun to be a part of from afar. Not only has it been fun to think that now I can add published author to my repertoire of friendships, but also I have witnessed someone living their dream. That is not something you get to do everyday. So here's to Jennifer Bradbury...someone who has inspired me repeatedly with her tenacity to become who she is meant to be...teacher, wife, author, traveler, friend, mother. Unlike myself, Jen is not a sideline-sitter. I desire to get into the game, but yet always find myself too lazy to move. Jen sets goals and realizes them. From traveling across the country on her bike, to teaching in India, to becoming the wonderful mother of Evie June - she has awakened me to the possibilities that lie within my own self. The limitations I am bound by have only been placed upon me by, well, It's high time that I listen to the beckoning in me and figure out what I have to contribute to this world. Wow, that's sort of intimidating - now I have to do something about that don't I? In the end this blog was really meant to get you to pick up Shift. Look for it at your local, independent bookseller or your local library, or order it on Amazon. Let me know what you think.

confused 3/13/08

So don't you hate it when you have to cough but you just can't get the phlegm to come forth? I have been hacking and hacking at the same junk in my chest for the past week. I am sure it has something growing in it. I probably have some sort of mossy forest growing in the luscious compost that is my phlegm. (I love the word phlegm by the way...not only does it cause my stomach to react with churning at the mere mention of it, but it also has one of the coolest non-phonemic spellings I know - it looks as gross as it's definition) Anyway, who knew I would blog about phlegm - yet since I started directing a child care center it seems that much of my discussions during the day are about some sort of bodily fluid. Whether it be blood, diarrhea, urine, snot, saliva, or the like - I am constantly assessing others by way of their excretions. I am not a big fan of such analysis. I'd much rather estimate one's disposition or wellness based on the smile on their face or better yet, the color of their eyes, but for some reason God chose for us to use the intimacy of relating to one another's mucus and other waste substances. Interesting really... in order to really assess how one is physically doing we really need to get into "their business" so to speak. Yet, when we are getting to know how our friends are doing emotionally or spiritually we tend to shy away. We don't want to offend them by asking too many questions and often times we just ask "how are you" as we run by. Do we really mean it? Do we really desire to know how they truly are doing or feeling? I am one of the biggest culprits of such meaningless exchanges. I tend try and blend into the crowd or better yet I use the class clown tactic. I am the funny-don't-take-anything-too-serious type of gal - therefore if I don't take anything serious then you won't expect me to take you serious either. Kind of, I hate to say it, like a mentally disabled person. Isn't that sad??? I'd rather people consider me mentally challenged than actually risk getting to know people. In the midst of blogging I am self-actualizing and I find myself to be really pathetic. Okay, maybe phlegm isn't so bad....if my friends could just bring me their pee in a cup I could analyze their emotional and spiritual status which I could easily diagnose..."Oh, the pee stick barometer is telling me you need a hug." "Well let's see, Lucy, according to your snot you've had a really rough day at school." Wait, maybe I should go get my mental health evaluated. I am starting to scare myself; you are probably deliberating the quality of our friendship. Trust me - I understand, but at least I'm working on it. After this blog, I'll be even more diligent.

i am a cheater 2/21/08

So crowder had us play a little game... Pull up your itunes and push random and voila tell us who pops up, and then he stated...I will know if I like you. You see, I really want Crowder to like me.... even though I probably will never meet the man (how does one get meet and greets anyway??). His theological philosophy is one I ascribe to and have enjoyed musing over. God inspires me through the music He has gifted to crowder (and fellow crowderbandmates) and his sarcastic sense of humor leads me to believe we could be friends.

However, my music, I am afraid might cause him to revolt and say, No - I definitely don't like could she even think we could be friends. my attempt to try to win over the cool kids...i became a cheater...
My first inclination was to use my own playlist as I have music on my computer that is my 10 year old daughter's as she syncs her ipod using my computer. Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers...even Barlowgirl..not my music so not a representation of whether or not I should be "liked". So I am not sure if that is considered cheating or not, but doesn't seem fair. (I know you are saying, sure...nice cover...but it's true, I promise..)

My next dilemma however is that in order to be a cool kid, I have learned that you must listen to Sufjan Stevens. I do own a Sufjan album...however, it is his Christmas album. In my playlist, I do not have my Christmas albums added. I have a Christmas playlist, therefore when I hit random there will be no Sufjan in the in order to not have Hannah Montana I had to give up Sufjan as well. I am confident that was a good choice because I am sure Sufjan would be quite dismayed to be in a playlist with Billy Ray's girl.

Secondly, I like country music. You'd think the boys from Texas would too, but you can never be too sure about that. Now, I am selective at the type of country music I listen to. I am not a big Kenny Chesney fan...don't really care for George Strait (although I've heard he's supposedly the king of country music)...but I really like a good Dixie Chicks song and I think Faith Hill has an amazing voice and well, Tim McGraw- he's just hot... So I know this admission of Country Music lovin' knocks me off the cool kids list for sure.

Third, I like indie music...I support indie artists...I go to local shows...however...I don't own a ton of this music. I know those coolies they have all the indie jams. The Shins...all the cool kids like The Shins..I've been meaning to get one of their albums...I did however buy the new Juno Soundtrack. It's good. I don't own any dylan...I don't own any kanye...I don't own any radiohead...I know you could get it for free. I will, I promise...I don't know why I haven't, I just keep forgetting.

So, when I hit shuffle, I looked it over and it just didn't seem cool I hit shuffle again, and again, and again, and again....finally with the realization I was never going to be cool enough. The level of cool is just too high for me to attain. In the midst of this I embraced it. I embraced all that makes Napoleon dynamite. I made my list (omitting artists listed twice - also cheating I know) I am sticking with it. I know I have a lot of evolving left to do on the turntable. Wait...the cool kids probably don't use a turntable do they? Shoot...

blog announced 12/17/2007

  • Writing is so personal, however if it is never proclaimed what good is it really? Your thoughts are yours alone, but why write them down if you never want them read... I have been struggling with this myself. I enjoy writing and feel a sense of accomplishment when finished with a journal piece, poem or random musing, yet I have never allowed anyone, save a professor or two, to read my rantings. Now on the world wide web for all to see seems both narcissistic and a bit excessive, yet at the same time familiarly comfortable. Much like going to a crowded place and becoming a shrinking violet, hoping no one will notice, yet longing to be seen. You can say, "I was there!", and everyone can respond, "Funny, I didn't see you." Giving you the satisfaction of having been at the party, but not the responsibility of participation. Anyway all that to say, my writings have now been unleashed. Through my myspace profile I have invited my friends to join me in this adventure in composition. Ready, set, go

My 1st blog...11/17/2007

  • Wow, I never thought I would join the ranks of blogging. I am more of a reader than a writer. Reading others insights has been intriguing to me and never would have I thought that my insights might be intriguing to others. But it is a nice outlet for my thoughts in a concrete way. Hopefully as my feet have grown bigger than the stamp of them in the concrete outside my parents home, my thoughts too will grow bigger. In the past my personal defenses have caused me to stump my own growth. Thinking, like most 20somethings, that I had all the knowledge I would ever need and also that I should bestow such wisdom onto others. That the elders around me weren't progessive enough or valuable enough to have worthwhile suggestions of their own. Now into my thirties I am realizing that I missed out on a good deal of wisdom and words. Why we go to college in our late teens and early 20's is beyond me. All of the vast knowledge offered and I took it all for granted, thumbing my nose at studying and laughing at not going to class. Here I sit longing for education, longing to know more, to learn more, to engage more. So blogging and reading others blogs is an exercise in education for me. I employ on this journey with great expections. Growing in my knowledge not only of this world and those who God has placed in it, but mostly growing in my knowledge of self.